Men do take more time

dm

Recently somewhere I read that as per the research analysis it is found that men do take more time to move on or come out of a break up as compared to women. Even I do feel so. I mean hold on before you start opposing me; let me brief. I completely agree that almost every woman is very emotional & that’s how God created them but still I’ve strong feeling that guys don’t express frequently or probably they have an art of suppressing their feeling which unusually explodes when they reach the super-depression point. I mean they don’t express instantly & try to handle the situation as much as they can do independently. They take more time to get emotionally involved or attached as compared to women but once they are in, they can’t get out of it so easily. I know there have been more significant incidents on-screen & off-screen too, where you must have come across a situation when your female friend is left upset by her boyfriend but still I feel it isn’t the case always.

In case of boys, their personal as well as professional life goes side by side, we have seen several cases when after break-up boys could not get hold of their career also. For example, you must have heard about Chatan Anand, where is he now? While his counterpart, Jwala Gutta climbing the ladder of success. I really appreciate her hard work & in fact I’m a big fan of her, whatever she has achieved today, probably has nothing to do with personal life. It doesn’t really mean that she has not faced the reality but she could stand strongly & bounce back. Where is Mohd. Asif & by the way you know where is Veena Malik now a days?

Do I really need to mention anything about Kareena & Shahid?

Apart from these celebrities, I personally know couple of guys who are very close to me; could never got out of their breakups (at least till date). Even after their girlfriends got happily married or engaged, they are still killing themselves day by day. Every time they watch any sentimental movie, their facial expression says it all. Trust me this is all I’ve seen. Even after trying to console them or convince them to face reality, they could never be able to come back on track. In spite of being scholar & toppers in their schools & colleges, even after successfully climbing the corporate ladder, all of a sudden as soon as their lady luck left them alone, they shattered like, nobody could have imagined. Sometimes they even end up, destroying their professional as well as person life which was far better when they were with their lady. Now, you must be thinking then why in the first place they could not be with her for whole life? When this question was asked, answer was weird & beyond our understanding.  “I could never decide when I was with her & when she is gone, I am unable to stay without her.

By saying all this, I seriously don’t mean to say that girls can quickly get up & move on, I do agree that even girls are also equally & severely hurt, in most cases take long time to settle down but it seems they are slightly stronger than boys in this case.

Trust me, boys are also very emotional, its just that they hold it back before they destroy themselves. And of course I would like to clarify that ultimately it depends from person to person how he or she reacts to the personal affairs.

P.S. Trust me, the guy who might look tougher or the one who sounds rude, can be emotionally weak & you can’t even imagine how much he would be loving you so please keep this thing back of your mind, “Though guys are not that good in expressing their feelings, they do love you & they too miss you, it’s just that they don’t speak up

P.P.S. All the views expressed here are completely my opinions & it may differ from individual views. I’ve no intention to disrespect any gender, especially I really respect women & I know that they are very sweet & understanding, too.

What’s wrong???

Since past few days I’ve been observing something strange & unexpected going on in my life. I don’t know why but usually these days I’m getting unexpected responses(Or you can say no responses at all) from people around me. I have a good habit to take some time & pass on my good wishes on any special occasion to the concerned person, so doesn’t matter how small the occasion is. I always remember those dates & make sure to wish them. The only logic behind this behavior is that, I know it always feels nice when your cellphone beeps specially on your birthday or so on… I do it with literally no expectations, as I have been doing this since long back & obviously what can I expect from a old friend whom I’ve not seen say almost more than a decade.

But since past few months I observed that I was not getting any response from the person I just wished. Everytime I assumed that very obviously he must be busy on such a special occasion but man come on tell me do you celebrate your birthday for 15 days?? Huh!!!

Ok let me tell you one incident happened recently. Few days back,one of my engineering mate messaged me on the ORKUT after long long time. He is out of the coutry say for 1 year. I happily responded him & asked me how was going… as expected there were few messages exchanged. After say 1 month, I wished him on his birthday through ORKUT only. But till this time, I have not received any response from him. Anyways I assume he might have missed my message amongst all other birthday wishes.

Ok other incident, I wished my sister on her birthday with an early morning SMS… No Response. So I called her after say 2 hours, I found nobody was answering the call. Ok so I got the answer that she forgot her cellphone :-) But anyways I’m very sure about her that she will not overlook me, so I’m happy :-)

So in all these happenings I’m not disappointed but definitely I’m concerned as I’m asking myself “What’s wrong on my behalf? What’s making people around me behaving like this?” Probably, 2 possibilities :

1. They don’t feel like responding as they feel its just a formality
2. They might be considering that I’m so understanding that even if they don’t reply, I will assume that they are busy :-)

Anwyays whatever it may be, I’ve decided to keep a close tap on my behavior to check out if I’m behaving oddly :-) That’s the best thing I can do… :-)

Why Sometimes???

I really don’t know why sometimes I feel lonely,sad & upset. Life has already given me enough of things & there is actually nothing I should crib for. Very understanding, loving & the most wonderful parents, couple of very close friends,Yes, including very close female friends as well, a good decent job with very impressive profile, a good healthy lifestyle; what a person can expect from life more than this? Still I wonder why sometimes I start feeling extremely low, very upset & that too all of sudden.

Sometimes I feel probably because I miss my Dad who has the biggest influence on my life, or my Mom the most respected person, with Never-Give-Up attitude, but on the other hand I think I make sure that I meet them after regular interval. So then again the same question pops-up in my mind “Why sometimes I feel so sad, lonely & upset???”

Definitely, I’m NOT depressed or fed of my life but in fact I’m very happy & contained with my life, but I’m always left clueless what goes wrong sometimes suddenly & unexpectedly? Is that something happens to me only or it happens with everyone? Surprisingly it lasts just for few minutes & after that I’m again jumping back :-) Then what makes me sad for that sometime. I know probably nobody can answer this question :-(

Hidden Positives behind the negatives, how?

I know this sounds very optimistic but yes it is very much possible. Though We know life is not always smooth & everyone has ups & downs in the life but for sure after every sad day, there comes a glad day. So in fact this is good exercise to use when you want to know what is really going on behind the scene. I will put my views how we can take things positively, I’ll also mention some experiences. There is something always positive behind the negative experiences, you just need to find it.

In fact, often we misinterpret obstacles as negative experiences, I mean its just like “We are not getting What we want and when we want it.” Sometimes even worse things happen simultaneously like you loose your job, your girlfriend ditches you & all of the above your house owner asks you to vacate his house. I know probably this is one of the worst case but let me put it here the other way round. You did not loose your job but you made yourself available for the better opportunity which is right here waiting for you. Your girlfriend freed you for the other better understanding & nice partner who is waiting & you are single. :-) And most importantly your house owner did not ask you to leave his house but he told you silently “Oh my boy, now its your age to buy a house, getting married & settle down”

I know it is very difficult to imagine & implement this kind of attitude, “you will say advising is very easy but actual implementation is very difficult.” Ok agreed but as I said earlier this was the worst case I discussed just before & even if it happens, yes it is difficult, very difficult to act positively under such circumstance but definitely its not impossible. I will not say always be aggressive but I will say for sometime just sit back, stay calm & try to find out what is exactly going wrong, is it really against you or just something which is passing you message & helping you to move on in your life.

Lets talk about the current situation. Everybody is aware how hard economic recession has hit!!! Even financial experts are unable to predict how critical it can go further. Bachelors are worried about their future, while married couples are worried about their families, expenses or whatever. First thing I would like to mention here is that I’m not an expert to suggest any solution especially when experts are backing off themselves from giving any concrete advice. But only thing I would like to mention here is that its time to think practically, instead of getting depressed start studying how you can handle this situation. Again, I do understand its very easy to suggest but seriously try this you will find so many motivating things behind recession. If you can survive this situation, you might have better life in future. Start keeping track of your expenses, there is nothing you should be feeling odd about this. As you know every big organisation keeps track of its expense & maintains a balance sheet then why cant you track your own expenses. No I’m not saying stop enjoying, spend money wherever it is really required & keep track of it. Though its a tough time, stay up to the mark & lets consider that some hidden power teaching you a lesson of how to save money & live a optimal life. Its just a bad patch in life, it will surely move on.

See quickly I gave you 2 examples. I hope those will surely help you to find out hidden positives behind the negatives. And as I said “Yes, some things are difficult to implement but not impossible.”